In the last year, I have spent a lot of time trying to discover the source of happiness, or maybe it is the source of unhappiness. Solve one and the other solves itself. I have even put out a ten-post series on the subject. Many of my other current focuses are indirectly related to this search. I know that China is not so much in … Continue reading The Real Secret To Happiness
How about a “Words of Wisdom” post today at RJsCorner. No two people have the same life story. Yeah, some people’s stories rhyme, but the details are often quite different. Since deaf Aspies are one in three million or so, I suspect my story is more unique than most. I tell my story here as a way of clearing my mind. Dozens of things pop … Continue reading Everybody’s Got A Story…
Even though I have decided to take RJsCorner in a different direction, I don’t want to leave the “Understanding Stupidity” series without a personal wrap up. The major point I have learned from this series is that mankind has been plagued with stupidity from its very start. Aristotle had things to say about stupidity in his time, and of course, with the way the world … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #9 – A Personal Wrap Up.
For this post, I am going to step back a little and look as someone besides Bonhoeffer for wisdom. This comes from an Italian economist Carlo Cipolla who was a leading expert in the field of human stupidity. He wrote his thoughts in a “tongue in cheek” Will Rogers style. To conserve space, I will only cover three of his laws here. 1. Distraction This … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #8 – The Three Primary Causes
The process at work here is not that particular human capacities, for instance, the intellect, suddenly atrophy or fail. Instead, it seems that under the overwhelming impact of rising power, humans are deprived of their inner independence, and, more or less consciously, give up establishing an autonomous position toward the emerging circumstances. The fact that the stupid person is often stubborn must not blind us … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #7. -Dealing With Slogans, Not A Person
This is a continuation of my series following Dietrich Bonhoeffer words about his belief that stupidity caused the Nazi era in Germany. I am trying to learn if his experiences mirror what is happening today in the U.S. Up to now, we have learned that you can’t defeat stupidity by reasoning with the person. The only way to make him realize his misguided faith is … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #6 – Stupidity Of Following The Herd
Yet at this very point it becomes quite clear that only an act of liberation, not instruction, can overcome stupidity. Here we must come to terms with the fact that in most cases a genuine internal liberation becomes possible only when external liberation has preceded it. Until then we must abandon all attempts to convince the stupid person. This state of affairs explains why in … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #5 – Overcoming Stupidity
“ People become stupid when they do not want to understand, where understanding would cause anxiety or guilt feeling, or would endanger an existing neurotic equilibrium. Deitrich Bonhoeffer This is a short quote from Bonhoeffer, but it speaks volumes about stupidity. I like the term Neurotic Equilibrium, it is a shortened way of saying they resist change, any change. I am just one to welcome and even seek … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #4 -Neurotic Equilibrium
Stupidity is a more dangerous enemy of the good than malice. One may protest against evil; it can be exposed and, if need be, prevented by use of force. Evil always carries within itself the germ of its own subversion in that it leaves behind in human beings at least a sense of unease. Against stupidity we are defenseless. Neither protests nor the use of … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #3 – How To Get The Better Of It.
As mentioned in the previous post in this series, I have discovered the hard way that happiness can never happen when you become fixated on your unhappiness. I think this post will be the end of this series, as I am becoming happier each day now. So, what have I learned. Happiness is a state of mind, not a destination Until you lose your focus … Continue reading Happiness #9 – Conquering Unhappiness
Stupidity is a more dangerous enemy of the good than malice. One may protest against evil; it can be exposed and, if need be, prevented by use of force. Evil always carries within itself the germ of its own subversion in that it leaves behind in human beings at least a sense of unease. Against stupidity we are defenseless. Neither protests nor the use of … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #2 – Stupidity Is A More Dangerous Enemy…
Ok, with this post, I am going to give you a personal secret on how I have finally became a happier person. No, I don’t think I have achieved total happiness, but I am on my way to it. I bring back the quote I ended the last happiness post with. “Don’t ask yourself what the world needs. Ask yourself what makes you come alive … Continue reading Happiness #8 – Doing What Makes You Come Alive…
As promised on my December 23rd post, this is the first in a series about Stupidity. It might seem strange to make this topic for a weekly series, but stupidity has serious connotations for our times, as it did during Bonhoeffer’s time in Hitler’s Germany. I came across Bonhoeffer about twenty years ago when I was doing an objective study of the Bible. At the … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity #1 – The Origins Of This Study
If we could just find the reason for why we are not happy maybe we can finally find happiness. That is the core thought for this post. Most people, including me for much of my life, feel unhappy. Good things happen to us, but we just have no idea why happiness eludes us. From what my research has discovered, here are a few causes : … Continue reading Happiness #7 – Why Are We Unhappy?
These last few years have been a struggle for all of us. There was the lying idiot narcissist who occupied the Oval Office. That made those four years almost intolerable, and then came the virus which we were totally unprepared for. Then for me 2021 was consumed with the death and dying of my wife. The trauma of that nearly consumed me. Now that this … Continue reading We All Need Something To Laugh About
Some people seem to just be happier than others. I envy them in that regard. But there are things that we can all do to be happier people. There are some things that each of us are intrinsically drawn to that are focused on personal growth and community. That can help boost our happiness. Another is to just enjoy the moment, and at least temporarily … Continue reading Happiness #6 – Cultivating Happiness
In the new RJsCorner, I want to get back to my roots, and Will Rogers is one of those roots I have avoided for too long. Years ago, when I started creating my personal style of writing, Will Rogers was a primary inspiration. I loved the way he could use humor to inform us on just about any topic. Some say that Mark Twain was … Continue reading Understanding Stupidity – Will Roger’s Style…
One of my first “big boy” books was a biography of Einstein. I think I was about twelve years old when I read the first one. It was about 300 pages long, and I didn’t image I would ever finish it, but it only took me a couple of weeks to do just that. For some reason, the book just clicked with me. I have … Continue reading Happiness #5 – According to Einstein
I have been casually studying of Aristotle for many years, and have recently started another book about him. He was definitely a dreamer/thinker that I could never even imagine being. It is amazing to me how so many of his thoughts still apply today. Since he is one of my heroes, it just seemed natural that I look to him as to what he said … Continue reading The Pursuit of Happiness #4: According to Aristotle
Let’s continue on with the look at the article What is Happiness by Kendra Cherry as mentioned last Wednesday. She says that happiness is a very subjective thing that varies greatly from one person to another. Here is a list from the above article that show key signs of happiness Feeling like you are living the life you wanted Feeling that the conditions of your … Continue reading The Pursuit of Happiness #3 – How To Know If You’re Happy
I have spent the last couple of weeks studying the idea of happiness. I’ve looked at a couple of dozen different sources for a place to start. One article I came across that impressed me with its brevity, yet completeness on this topic was What is Happiness by Kendra Cherry. Click HERE if you want to see the entire article. This article from October 2020 … Continue reading The Pursuit of Happiness #2 – Where To Start…
Welcome to the new Wednesday series entitled The Pursuit of Happiness. This series, we will be studying what happiness has meant throughout the ages, and trying to discover within ourselves what it means to each of us. As usual, I don’t have a step-by-step agenda for this new series yet. It will depend on what we discover on our path to happiness. A primary reason … Continue reading The Pursuit of Happiness #1 – Changing My View
The strongest emotion that I think I have is empathy for those, like me, who have faced some pretty serious struggles through life. That, and my lack of a sense of accomplishment in this emotions series, is what this post is all about. Happily it ends with a possible step forward in this general arena. Adversity Builds Character So, I ought to have a lot … Continue reading About Emotions #8 – Summing It Up
I have learned over my life that to survive as a deaf person on the Spectrum, I need to control my emotions. That doesn’t mean to stifle them, but to instead understand where they are coming from and to try to focus them in a positive direction. A central part of this Emotion series is about my life experiences with emotions. I have been studying … Continue reading About Emotions #7 – Confusion Among the Experts… And A Path Forward
No, I am not talking about adding a few more years to my life, although that would be welcomed, at least if they were healthy years. What I am talking about is my special series entitled “About Emotions”. I told you at the start of this series that I wanted to get more info about just what emotions are all about. I wanted to see … Continue reading About Emotions #6 -I Need More Time…
I thought I would give you this epilogue to expand the story on the final week of the trauma of my wife’s death. I know this story is mostly unique to me, and maybe I am penning it more for my benefit than yours, but I can see something similar possibly happening to you. So, maybe my “lessons learned” can be helpful for you. When … Continue reading End Of Life Trauma #10 – Freeing & Strangling, At The Same Time
I know I promised you some posts on the science of emotions, but I had no idea just how difficult that would turn out to be. The problem is that is there is virtually no agreement on even what are emotions, let alone categorizing them. It’s kind of like the Christian church. There are currently about 39,000 different versions of both. No one seems to … Continue reading About Emotions #5 – Emotions Are Kinda Like The Christian Church…
I am finally convinced that I am now in the full stage of the grieving process due to my wife’s death in July. It took me a while to get here. I was beginning to wonder if I was actually capable of such emotions. But, now they are coming in floods, it seems. The thing that perhaps finally pushed me here was a simple pamphlet … Continue reading About Emotions #4 – The Grieving Process… Finally
The title to this post is a biblical proverb that means that people should take care of their own defects and not just correct the faults of others. I do agree with that, but I also see it as working out our personal problems ourselves instead of letting others try to do it for you. I think perhaps both of those examples is the basis … Continue reading About Emotions #3 – Heal Thy Self
Before I get into the psychological aspects of this new series, I want to help you, and myself, to understand the depth of my troubles with emotions. That is what this post is about: I have been having some pretty severe mood swings lately. I know for many that is caused by being pregnant. But, despite the title above, I really don’t think that is … Continue reading Emotions # 2 – I Think I Might Be Pregnant??
Last week, when I finished up the series End Of Life Trauma, I told you that I would take a few weeks off before I settled on the next “Wednesday series”. I visited the last post of that series dozens of times during my usual editing process, but it was not until it was officially published a week ago that the obvious follow-up series came … Continue reading About Emotions #1 – These Strange Feelings
I’m sure most people think of hospice as that short period that ends the suffering of terminal patients. This post will try to explain that this description is simplified at best, and actually somewhat misguided. As my wife continued her final eight days in hospice at our new home at the best senior community in our region, she was without pain because of the regular … Continue reading End of Life Trauma #9 – The Final Week.
These next two post in the series will probably be the most difficult to write. But they were also the time I came across the most empathic person I have ever known. I finished off the last post on this End-Of-Life Trauma series by telling you that my wife was being kicked out of the Hospice House because she was not dying fast enough. Of … Continue reading End of Life Trauma Part 8 – Hospice (continued)
It seems that I am now in some new stage of grief from my wife’s recent death. It has been two months today that she drew her last breath. I think up till now I have just been consumed with all the many things that have to happen after a spouse passes to really have time to mourn. Lately, I seem to be getting very … Continue reading Stages of Grief…
We are closing in on the last few posts about “End Of Life Trauma”. I hope this series is at least a little helpful to you in understanding these matters. While I had some exceptional support during this “Hospice” period, it was one of the most stressful things I have ever had to deal with in my life. As I mentioned in my last post … Continue reading End of Life Trauma Part 7 – Hospice
This is a continuing series about the end-of-life trauma of my recently departed wife. I was totally unprepared for what I would encounter during this 78-day period. I post this series to maybe prepare some of you for the same eventuality. All of us have to die sometime. Some of us go peacefully in our sleep, and some take months, even years, to pass. As … Continue reading End of Life Trauma Part 6 – The Final Hospital Stay