They say it’s the little things that matter. All the little moments that make up our day to day lives. We never seem to appreciate them, nor do we seem to acknowledge the long and impossible road behind us. We rarely stare in the rear view mirror to see what we’ve accomplished so far. We rarely enjoy the ride. We want to get to the destination as fast as possible. We don’t want any dead ends, we don’t want hours and hours of endless nothing.
But the thing is, life’s just a matter of perspective. We become who we think we are, and we see what we choose to see. Spend too much time in the future, admiring a version of you that feels impossible to build, and it’s just as painful and mind-numbing as wallowing yourself in the past.
SOURCE: Day to day lives « Cristian Mihai.
My young Romanian friend seems to be spending much time on his blog lately trying to raise money. I’m not sure if it is to allow him more time to write or to get the latest book published. I must admit that I usually only scan those posts and then move on to the next one. But as usual he sometimes comes across with a thought provoking one and this is one of those.
As is typical I think of his generation he seems to be looking almost exclusively to the future. The present and the past just don’t seem important. When most of your days are ahead of you that is a natural course. I know I spent too many hours dreaming of the future when I was his age. Throughout my life I have been plagued with the question “what do I want to do when I grow up?” I spent too much time worrying about the distant future instead of what I could do at the time.
That perspective changes as we age and sometimes changes dramatically when we see more behind us than what is in front. As my young friend notes we never appreciate all the time we spend doing the day-to-day things. We let them pass without much notice. When we are older we spend more time in the past. We wonder what might have been the consequence if we had made this decision instead of that one. We, well I guess I can only say I, look back to see different possibilities. Part of that is probably because I am never satisfied with what I have accomplished. I could have done better if I had put my mind to it. I could have done better if I had had the guts to do something differently.
Living in the present is just something that is difficult for me. Even in these twilight years I am still looking for that something that gives me complete satisfaction. But like perfection, completely satisfying is an unknowable thing. I don’t know how many years I have left on this earth but somehow I have to get it through my mind to spend more time in the here and now instead of the past or the future.
Thank you my young friend for helping me to realize that fact.