I have been spending some serious time lately trying to come up with better ways to spend the remaining time of my life here on earth. How can I be happier and less stressful about my life in particular and in general the world today?
Several reasons probably prompted this search. One is that I turned 70 not long ago. This birthday hit me much harder than any other. I don’t think I really had a mid-life crisis so maybe this is my version of it to be called late-life crisis. The other primary reason is my recent brain trauma event of which I am still recovering and could have ended my life. These two events, along with probably many other more minor factors has just got me deeply thinking about how I have lived my life and how I can make it better in my final years.
One of the conclusions I have come to is that I just spend too much time focusing on what is wrong with things. My first thoughts on just about any topic is to find something to make the situation better. That is my contrarian nature that gives me a particular insight about many things and that in itself is a good thing. But sometimes it just gets in the way of just enjoying life. Another root cause is that I overthink way too much. Somethings should just be enjoyed for what they are without considering how to make them better and some should just be accepted as they are without a lot of thought.
Miscommunications is a big part of my dealings with others and that often bothers me. This misunderstanding is probably due to my apparent Asperger’s Syndrome. I forget that my way of looking at things is often quite different from others. For instance, I too often assume that others are uncaring about a situation because they don’t know the details that I do. Healthcare and our nation’s military spending are two of the more serious topics in this arena. I think we all have a tendency to egocentrically put our own perspective on to others so it’s worth remembering that everyone’s attention shows the world in a particular way, and what gets spotlighted differs from person to person. I need to understand that going forward.
These are just a few of the topics that have been stewing in my mind lately. I’m sure I will have much more to say about other areas in the coming months. In the meantime, I will try my darndest to chill out a little more and not let things that I have little control over get me so upset. I think that is a pretty good start.
I would love to hear some of the things that you struggle with that get in the way of a happier life. We can all learn something from each other on this topic.
2 thoughts on “Making For A Better Life”
This is something I have struggled with since the death of my husband 4 years ago…finding purpose and a life. After going through much emotion, I have settled as well as I can and find it’s the simple little things I enjoy.
I also just turned 70 and for the first time, the fact that my time has entered a new decade and maybe my last, has settled in my mind and not always peacefully.
I truly don’t worry about the things I can’t change like politics. All I can do is vote and keep informed as best as I can. I try to look at the big picture and civilizations comings and goings over long timeframes. I think the statement “this too shall pass” is a good one. We just may not see it. I now just want peace of mind and serenity, which for some, can be found in nature.
I’ve realized that all life holds sadness, regrets and bad luck and we tend to focus on that more than the good, happy times. This is just life.
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Mary, thank you for your story. You are further down this road than I am so I appreciate you wisdom on the topic. It looks like the 70 thing hit you about the same way as me. This will likely be my last decade on this earth and that is a sobering thought. Not worrying about things I can’t have much of an effect on is hard for me but I will try to take your advice.
Yeah, the silver linings is where I want to reside in these final years. Thanks again for the thoughts.