Category: Life On The Margins

All the other things about living life outside the main stream.

Life On The Margins2 Comments

Coping With Deafness And My 10 Pillars

RJ Walters

I want to continue on from my 10 Pillars post of last week with a personal story about the second pillar which is “You are not alone”.  As I have mentioned before I want deaf in 1988 at the age of forty-two, but I had been hearing impaired for years before that. I lost hearing in one ear during my early college years in the 1960s.  Since I had no insurance and I couldn’t afford to pay doctor bills and college tuition at the same time, it would be a few years later when I discovered the cause of my … Continue reading Coping With Deafness And My 10 Pillars

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Explaining Our Times…

RJ Walters

Ok, I admit that I have been retired from the workforce for almost two decades now, so aside from what I read I am pretty much ignorant of it. When I left the workforce the mantra was “Do more with less”. Many of my coworkers were being laid off and I was told that I had to do their jobs in addition to my own.  I couldn’t imagine a more stressful situation today. When I came across this article by By Ruth Whippman in the New York Times it helped me to have more empathy for today’s middle-class workers.  Ms. Whippman is the … Continue reading Explaining Our Times…

Life On The Margins, Redux1 Comment

Who Are You??

RJ Walters

Like most of us, people often ask me who I am?  When we are in our employment years we often answer with our current occupation.  For me, that was an IT/Database developer. Depending on who is asking we sometimes give a different answer. But in reality, it takes years and often an entire lifetime to determine who we really are. Throughout our lives, we struggle with one thing or another and those struggles are a big part of what forms who we are. They say that diversity builds character and I can certainly attest to that fact. Living in poverty … Continue reading Who Are You??

Having My Say, Life On The Margins5 Comments

I Need More Balance…

RJ Walters

I need more balance in my life and especially in my blogging. Part of my base character that is associated with my Asperger’s traits is I tend to become obsessively focused on something and everything else just falls by the wayside.  The day-to-day insanity coming from the Oval Office along with the now weekly mass killings is putting me over the edge.  I have to force myself to greatly diminish my attention to these subjects. To do that I am now going to try to broaden the scope of coverage here at RJsCorner. As you can see from the header … Continue reading I Need More Balance…

Life On The Margins, Redux3 Comments

Looking At The World…

RJ Walters

I know there are very basic differences in how people look at the world.  I personally get much of my worldview from the words of Jesus and that certainly includes his very obvious stands on empathy and wealth. One of the things I love about Jesus is that he led by example.  How many changes of clothes did Jesus have?  How many castles? How many servants? I don’t think there is anyone who can’t answer these questions. He led a life of poverty. He led by example. Did he hate the rich? Well, no not really but he did have … Continue reading Looking At The World…

Life On The Margins, Philosophical Thoughts, XX - Everything Else6 Comments

About Empathy

RJ Walters

I am convinced that, as a general rule, my Republican friends pretty much lack empathy to any degree. I know this could be “painting with a broad brush” type thing but hear me out. I find example after example of this fact in my daily life. Let me give you a few examples. I have a Republican friend who goes on and on about how all those people on welfare are freeloaders.  To him, they are just too lazy to go out and get a job.  I try to tell him that on the average most people are on welfare … Continue reading About Empathy

Life On The Margins2 Comments

Autism and Meltdown

RJ Walters

Being a person with some strong Aspie traits, I just don’t handle stressful situations well.  Fortunately, I don’t totally lose it as the word meltdown infers but I quit acting like an adult and instead am a panicked kid. In autism studies, these episodes are called meltdowns so I will call them that for the purposes of this post. One of my most prominent stressors is criticism. I am plainly oversensitive. I often perceive my wife’s criticism as calling me a complete idiot. When those situations occur I frequently go into at least some level of meltdown. I start shouting … Continue reading Autism and Meltdown

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The Cutting Room Floor

RJ Walters

“You are not alone” is one of my Ten Pillars of life. The thought is that no matter what adversities you face, there is always someone who has had them before you and they can help you learn how to cope. Asking for help is a hard thing to do for many of us. We just don’t want to admit to ourselves that we sometimes struggle through life, let alone broadcast that fact to the world! It takes a brave person to do that. One of those brave people is Michelle over at the Green Study. She recently came out … Continue reading The Cutting Room Floor

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Being Afraid of Minorities… Why??

RJ Walters

Fear is what drives far too many of us in the US right now.  The majority of the most fearful live in the less populated rural areas of the country. You only need to look at the red/blue map to see that reality.  Here are some causes as I see it of this inordinate fear: For many of these folks fear is due to just not knowing others different than themselves. Due to their isolated conditions, they just have a much smaller worldview than many of us. Education is another factor. Almost twice as many urban Americans have college degrees … Continue reading Being Afraid of Minorities… Why??

Life On The Margins3 Comments

I Am A Rock…

RJ Walters

Since I was a teenager in the 1960s, one of my favorite musical groups was Simon & Garfunkel. One of their most popular songs was “I am a Rock”. Due to my Aspie traits, I was somewhat of a loner back then so this song just “spoke” to me.  My mother had abandoned me a few years before, so that probably had something to do with it too. The song is basically about a desire to avoid pain and heartbreak. In order to avoid being hurt by relationships, the subject of the song refuses to make friends or fall in love.  … Continue reading I Am A Rock…

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Patterns

RJ Walters

All my life I have been inexplicably attracted to patterns. I  never understood why until one day in the last year or so I discovered that a strong attraction to patterns is one of the characteristics of Asperger’s Syndrome.  At that time I discovered that I have many others. Now that I have a name for so many of the things I was troubled about in my youth, it gives me a peace that I have been searching for all my life. Walls, such as this one in Galena Illinois are simply beautiful as far as I am concerned. They, like … Continue reading Patterns

Life On The Margins1 Comment

Turning Back the Odometer…

RJ Walters

I like old cars and I am kinda proud of passing on some of my experiences in life here on RJsCorner. Yeah, there are things, actually quite a few, that I would like to have been different but even the undesired things are an important part of my life’s experiences, that looking back have made me who I am. If I hadn’t been deaf I wouldn’t have the level of empathy that I do. If I had not grown up in a single very stoic parent household I wouldn’t have the understanding of such things as I do. As another … Continue reading Turning Back the Odometer…

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A Lot Of Noise Goin On…

RJ Walters

I don’t know why I seem to be so fixated on sounds lately let alone poultry stuff.  My daily and weekly posts here are RJsCorner are now named after sounds (cackle and squawk) that chickens make. I need to get to the underlying reason for this. :)  I lost my hearing thirty years ago, and since then my brain has forgotten what many sounds sound like.  Sadly one of those areas is musical instruments.  I used to play the guitar, not terribly well but to my own satisfaction, and I really enjoyed that pleasure. Now when I see a musical instrument … Continue reading A Lot Of Noise Goin On…

Life On The Margins2 Comments

Turn Your Wounds Into Wisdom

RJ Walters

I get weekly quotes from iHearts143Quotes to help me understand life. This one particularly got my attention. It might seem strange to some but I have often said that  I am a better person because of my deafness. What I mean by that is that through the challenges I have faced because of my deafness has made me much more aware of those who struggle in life. My empathy factor went up several orders of magnitude because of my deafness. I have come to realize that my inflictions and afflictions (ha) add to the quality of my life. I was … Continue reading Turn Your Wounds Into Wisdom

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Dispelling Myths vs Reimaging

RJ Walters

Yesterday’s post was all about spin and how we too often try to reimage something because makes us uncomfortable.  It was primarily about the fact that we need to dispell the myth instead of just re-naming the condition.  Today I want to talk about why this topic is so important to me. As I have often said, being deaf is a major part of my life but it is not what I am about.  I almost never say I am a deaf man but instead say I am a man who is deaf. There is a critical difference between the two. If … Continue reading Dispelling Myths vs Reimaging

Life On The Margins5 Comments

About Humanism…

RJ Walters

Over at my blog RedLetterLiving.net I spent five years exploring various forms of religion concentrating on Christianity in all its shapes.  I came away from that study convinced that the vast majority of Christian religions, of which there are thousands, spend very little time on the words of Jesus and it seems that many are now spending more time in the political realm than anything else. One glaring omission from that study was of Humanism.  As a then member of an Evangelical church, I was basically told that Humanists were the scourge of the earth.  They were all God-hating atheists who despised … Continue reading About Humanism…

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What To Do about Extreme Poverty In The USA?

RJ Walters

When you think about extreme poverty I’m sure you mostly think of third world countries. It is hard to imagine that over 3 million people in the US  live on less than $2 per day. According to the World Bank, 769 million people lived on less than $1.90 a day in 2013; they are the world’s very poorest. Of these, 3.2 million live in the United States, and 3.3 million in other high-income countries (most in Italy, Japan and Spain)… Even for the whole population, life expectancy in the United States is lower than we would expect given its national … Continue reading What To Do about Extreme Poverty In The USA?

Life On The Margins4 Comments

The Trouble with Lies…

RJ Walters

Being unable to read is illiteracy. That is tragic but something even worse is being able to read but choosing not to.  Of course, you know who I am talking about. We have never had a president in our history who was proudly illiterate until now.  He claims he is a genius and graduated first in his class at Wharton College.  A reporter recently found public records of those who made the Dean’s List during those years and Mr. Trump was never on the list. So how could someone who graduated at the top of his class not make the … Continue reading The Trouble with Lies…

Life On The Margins4 Comments

Satisfying Retirement and RJsCorner

RJ Walters

One of my regular blog reads is Satisfying Retirement from Bob Lowry. Bob’s blog is much more popular than mine and as a result of him mentioning RJsCorner in his blog list, I get quite a few referrals from it. Some of his readers who visit RJsCorner might be interested in how very different people can become friends. Over the years we have become pretty good blog buddies. At this point in our lives we share many of the same beliefs and feelings, but from his post of yesterday entitled  If Life Had a Do-Over Option, Would I ? and previous discussions we … Continue reading Satisfying Retirement and RJsCorner