Aspie Traits – Assets vs Liabilities..

Banner Aspie  It has been a while since I talked about my Aspie traits. I have decided I won’t call myself an Aspie but will state that I have many of the characteristics of one.  Asperger’s Syndrome is part of the Autism Spectrum and the breadth of the syndrome is wide indeed.  Some, like myself live a pretty normal life while others struggle with day to day activities.

At least to me and I expect many others who are more knowledgeable of the Syndrome recognize that the traits are spread between assets and liabilities.  In this and future posts in this category I want to talk about both sides. So here goes:

Asset – We Are Forthright  Simply stated we speak our mind where others might hold back. That has always seemed a natural state to me, especially in the last decade or so.  I still can’t understand why people don’t speak forthrightly, but I do understand how it can cause you to get into trouble.  When I was a member of an LCMS Lutheran church I used to regularly attend Bible Study classes after the service.  When something didn’t make sense to me I spoke up. The more I did the more the pastor seem to get  upset. Especially when he couldn’t answer the question. It wasn’t long before I was told I couldn’t be a Lutheran anymore as I didn’t believe the “right” things.  Too much forthrightness got me in trouble. When we were asked to leave my wife blurted out “Why couldn’t you keep your mouth shut!!”  She still doesn’t understand that is just the way I am.

Liability – We have difficulty accepting criticism  This liability has given me trouble throughout my married life.  I can’t help it but it seems that my wife is constantly criticizing me for one thing or another.  Everything in the world seems to be my fault to one degree or another.  I sometimes get the feeling that she doesn’t think I can flush a toilet without screwing it up.  I guess other married guys can take this in stride but I have constant trouble in dealing with it.  Sometimes it results in some rather serious verbal spats.   I know I should not be so upset by criticism but that fact doesn’t help when I boil over because of it.

 

2 thoughts on “Aspie Traits – Assets vs Liabilities..

  • I think being forthright is admirable as long as it’s not done with sarcasm and rudeness. I wish I could sometimes voice my opinions stronger, but I never have liked confrontations. As for not handling criticism well, I don’t think anyone does. My deceased husband became more critical after his retirement and it was and still is a cause for hurt and angst in my life. Something you never forget.
    As for speaking up in Bible class, I wish more religious people had a kinder less judgmental attitude that, to me, has done a huge disservice to God, if there is one.

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    • Thanks for the thoughts Mary. Rudeness is not an easy thing for me to understand. Being forthright is being direct and without evasion, rudeness just doesn’t enter into the equation, but I have been told that I sometimes hurt people’s feelings with my directness. The bible says don’t judge people so yeah that should be a christian virtue but simply isn’t in many cases.

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